Screenplay Movie Script Pdf: February 2010

For Aspiring Screenwriters - The Screenwriter Consortium

Hello all. Wanted to give you a heads up on a very cool project in the works. A friend of mine, Elsa, one of the smartest and nicest people you'll ever meet, realized one day that the model for selling screenplays was broken, specifically when it came to the Latino market (if you're ever in the mood to laugh for an hour, ask Elsa her opinion on the current crop of Latino-themed movies in theaters). Both a writer and a business woman herself, she decided to use her business acumen to correct that. As she reached out to the Latino community, she realized that there were all kinds of minority markets that were being overlooked, and decided to expand her original vision to include struggling writers from all walks of life. Basically, she's approaching the spec market from a radically different angle. But because she's the expert here, I'll let her explain it to you.

Howdy, Scriptshadow!

Thanks for the opportunity to appear on your insightful blog—an honor, a privilege, and I promise that check will clear next week—this time for real.

The Screenwriter Consortium’s intent is to develop script inventories for a variety of target audiences. We began the process targeting the Latino market because of the billion dollars per year this group represents. Success with the Latino market should open up opportunities in other markets, e.g., women, mature, genre marketing, other ethnic, etc., with the hope of providing writers another venue in which to sell his/her scripts.

Rather than solicit script sales on a script-by-script, writer-by-writer basis, the inventory method allows the buyer to evaluate scripts on a target market basis—scripts written to appeal directly to a chosen audience.

In addition, the Latino Heart Blog speaks directly with our target audience, serves to develop awareness of the lack of English-speaking, Latino-centric feature films developed by Hollywood while entertaining our readers. After all, we are entertainers, aren’t we?

Our primary goal is not for our writer members to obtain representation, win writing contests, or receive accolades for literary prowess…our goal is TO.SELL.SCRIPTS.

Thanks for listening,
Elsa

P.S. If any of you haven’t tried Scriptshadow’s script consulting service…he’s brutal, vicious, ruthless, mean—and always right. I hate him.

Not really, I wanna impress the school yard bullies so I don’t get beat up, too.

For more questions, contact Elsa at screenwriterconsortium@gmail.com

Weekly Rundown

Jessica Hall back again, doing what she does best. And no, for all you e-mailers asking, Jessica is not the love child of the mega-sensation 80s pop group "Hall and Oats." There's enough juiciness in here to open a Robek's. Superman being re-re-re-re-booted by Goyer. The It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia boys selling a Hangover clone. Christensen getting another million dollar payday when life has already been too kind to him (he's a rock star). A project about politeness and manners is being put into the pipeline. David Gordon Green is staying in the mainstream by directing The Sitter. And they're making a Zoolander 2 with Jonah Hill as the villain. And Russel hid Boston Rob's hat. Wow, we could talk about this stuff for months. -- My ass is too lazy to embed the links right now so you'll have to wait your equally lazy asses until later.

Russel says: "Do they know who's running the show? I'm the puppet-master. Except when Jessica Hall gives me the Scriptshadow Rundown. When Jessica gives the rundown, it's all cool. Cause I love Jessica."

New spec KILLER by Kenny Golde (dir. THE JOB) sold to Parkes/MacDonald and Hyde Park in a bidding war. Script uses the documentary-style footage (à la PARANORMAL ACTIVITY) to tell the story of a serial killer and the detectives trying to catch him. (http://bit.ly/cNFpJj)

Paramount and Montecito picked up Lee & Walsh’s (“It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia “) spec 21 SHOTS. It’s based on an idea by writers Hurwitz & Schlossberg (GRANDMA VS. GRANDMA) who are also producing. While they’ve sold pilots to FBC and ABC, this is Lee & Walsh’s first spec. 21 Shots centers around a guy who, on his 21st birthday, loses his I.D. and needs to track it down over the course of a day. Montecito bought the spec preemptively through their Paramount discretionary fund. (http://bit.ly/ceUnXR)

It took over a week, but Lionsgate finally won the bidding war over Shawn Christensen's (KARMA COALITION) spec ABDUCTION, reportedly for nearly $1 million. Taylor Lautner is attached to star. Lionsgate is expected to rush to get a director on the project and begin production before they lose Lautner to his many other commitments. (http://bit.ly/aKaAho)

Warner Bros. is out to writers after picking up a pitch from Underground Films’ Nick Osborne. Untitled picture is based on Emily Post’s bestselling book “Etiquette” and is billed as “My Fair Lady” with the genders reversed. (http://bit.ly/cs0aOr)

Erin Cressida Wilson (CHLOE) is set to adapt Lisa See's book "Peony in Love" for Fox 2000 and Scott Free. Set in 17th century China, the book revolves around a young woman who starves herself to death after falling in love with a man she fears she'll never be allowed to wed. (http://bit.ly/9Cua2m)

It’s a good week for writing team Posamentier & Moore. In addition to writing GRANDMA'S INTERGALACTIC BED & BREAKFAST for Disney and Mandeville, they will make their directing debut with BETTER LIVING THROUGH CHEMISTRY. INTERGALACTIC, an adaptation of the first book in Clete Smith’s series that Disney optioned last year, is about a boy who goes to visit his hippie grandmother and discovers her inn caters to vacationing aliens. CHEMISTRY centers on a meek small-town pharmacist who begins an affair with a trophy wife who introduces him to the wonderful world of prescription drugs. But when they begin to plot her husband's murder, everything falls apart. The duo, former execs at Double Feature and Mad Chance Prods., respectively, are also penning "Oh Happy Day" for Disney and Mandeville. (http://bit.ly/bzy8qx, http://bit.ly/b3fEjt)

Fox announced that Alex Tse (WATCHMEN) will adapt the first book in John Twelve Hawks’ Fourth Realm Trilogy. THE TRAVELER is set in a U.S. society run by a secret organization who control the population via constant observation. Seeking to rebel against these constraints are an almost extinct group of people called Travelers, who can project their spirit into other dimensions, and their protectors, called Harlequins. Project was previously set up at Universal and Kennedy/Marshall with a script by Miro & Bernard (PRINCE OF PERSIA). (http://bit.ly/d6ph07)

Gregory Allen Howard (REMEMBER THE TITANS) is back to football for his next project. He’ll write THE MAGICIAN, a biopic about Marlin “The Magician” Briscoe, the first black starting quarterback. (http://bit.ly/aZ1VCs)

Greg Berlanti will rewrite and direct comic adaptation THE FLASH for Warner Bros. Previous draft was by Dan Mazeau (JONNY QUEST). Berlanti wrote GREEN LANTERN and was attached to direct until Martin Campbell boarded that project. (http://bit.ly/dj7iXX - subscription required).

David Gordon Green (PINEAPPLE EXPRESS) will direct Gatewood & Tanaka’s 2009 spec THE SITTER. Comedy, a cross between SUPERBAD and ADVENTURES IN BABYSITTING, sold to Fox in a bidding war. Jonah Hill (SUPERBAD) will star. (http://bit.ly/aSrCKM)

Ben Stiller will re-team with writer Justin Theroux (TROPIC THUNDER) for ZOOLANDER 2 at Paramount. It’s not known if Owen Wilson will return, but Jonah Hill is in negotiations to play the villain. (http://bit.ly/crcOxs)

David Goyer (THE DARK NIGHT story) will write the UNTITLED SUPERMAN REBOOT for Warner Bros. Director Christopher Nolan (THE DARK NIGHT) is also involved as an advisor. Goyer is currently working with Jonathan Nolan on a script for the next Batman installment. (http://bit.ly/94Unli)

Oscar nominated writer Sheldon Turner (UP IN THE AIR) will write and produce KISS AND TELL, a rom-com, based on a pitch by Shelby & Stevens (A FAMILY AFFAIR). The Universal pick up is about a woman who discovers she has the power to see exactly how a long-term relationship will unfold with a man after kissing him. (http://bit.ly/dej3Kb)

Antonio Banderas will produce, write, direct and act in a biopic on Boabdil (Abu Abdullah Muhammad XII), the last Muslim ruler of Granada, Spain. Antonio Soler (SUMMER RAIN) will co-write. Project is still seeking financing. (http://bit.ly/9jGpKz)

Reader Favorites Update

It's been a good 4-5 months since we did our first polling of reader favorites. Since I constantly update my list, I think it's only right that that list gets updated as well. So if there are some screenplay reads you've been putting off, get to them, cause in about three weeks, I'm going to ask everybody, once again, for their top 10 favorite unmade screenplays. Get that list figured out!

Titan Week - "Night Skies"

TITAN WEEK 5 OF 5

If you’ve been following Titan Week, here are the first four titans we reviewed: 1) Shane Black 2) David Benioff 3) Kurtzman and Orci 4) Frank Darabont - Today, we’re calling in the Big Kahuna, Steven Spielberg…sort of. I don’t have an actual Spielberg script, but I do have a script he developed with John Sayles titled, “Night Skies.”

Genre: Sci-Fi
Premise: A rural family must fight off a group of pesky aliens who invade their house.
About: Who’s a bigger titan than the man himself? Steven Spielberg! As has been the theme this week, I’m cheating a little, because Spielberg didn’t actually write Night Skies. The studio wanted him to come up with a sequel to Close Encounters Of The Third Kind, but he was putting Raiders together, so he didn’t have the time. But instead of allowing the studio to screw up his franchise the way they did with Jaws, he commissioned John Sayles to write a script from an idea of his based off of a “true” story he heard. The thing was, Spielberg wasn’t into it, and the project never really had a shot. He did however read it to Harrison Ford’s future wife on the set of Raiders, and she was taken by the relationship between one of the characters and an alien. This connection inspired Spielberg to come up with the idea for E.T. In a funny twist, Universal was desperate for Spielberg not to make some schmaltzy kiddy Disney movie, and tried to get him to ditch the project. He ignored their wishes and made it anyway. And we got glowing fingers, the power of reeses pieces, and 7 year olds calling each other “penis breath” as a result. John Sayles is no slouch. He’s been nominated for two Oscars, 1996’s “Lone Star” and 1992’s “Passion Fish.” But seeing as he doesn’t have a single additional sci-fi flick on his resume, I wonder if he was the right man for the job.
Writer: John Sayles (based on an idea by Steven Spielberg)
Details: 100 pages (this is the only draft ever written)

John Sayles

Oh Priscilla. How did we end up here? Three foot tall aliens “terrorizing” a local farm family? I know this supposedly “happened” in real life (it’s since been criticized as one of the most blatant hoax attempts in history) but man, I’m not sure Spielberg ever sized this idea up. It's such a neutered idea, in fact, that if I were a betting man, I'd guess that Spielberg put this in development with the sole intention of preventing someone else from making a Close Encounters Of The Third Kind sequel. Speaking of interesting screenplays, how bout that one for you? If you ever want to watch a film that seems to follow no sort of structure or rules whatsoever, and whose entire story depends on our desire to see the aliens at the end, go watch that. In the meantime, let me try and break down Night Skies for you.

Tess in an 18 year old hot country girl who lives with a really fucked up country family. There’s her always angry father, her bible-thumping mother, her ganja-smoking little brother, her slightly deranged grandmother, and, of course, her retarded youngest brother, Jaybird.

Although not a lot happens in Bumblefuck, Nowhere, it’s been unusually busy as of late. There have been a series of cow mutilations making their way up the state, and the latest one has happened right over on their neighbor’s plot. But this isn’t any normal mutilation. The cow’s face seems to have been seared off with geometric precision, its brain plucked out as if a surgeon himself had done it. This gets the locals up in a tizzy, cause rural folk have a lot of patience, but one thing they don't like is when people mutilate their cows. Trust me, I know from experience.

Once the cow-killing chatter calms down, the characters spend a whole lot of time doing zippity-zilch. Tess cares after Jaybird because no one else will. The father complains a lot, especially about the fact that he has a retarded son. The mother says little unless a lesson from the bible is needed. The brother, keeping it real, protests that his parents are too strict. This is all about as exciting as you'd expect it to be. And we're jonzeing for something - anything - to happen.

Well later that night we get our wish because when everyone’s back home, the lights cut out and the family starts seeing little heads and arms zip past the windows. Not taking any chances, they lock down the house, but it isn't enough, cause whatever was outside finds a way inside. We come to find out that they’re being…I wouldn’t say “attacked”…but maybe “hassled” by 3 foot tall aliens. And these aliens are really good hasslers. They bang on the windows and sneak through the cat doors. They make funny faces and leap out of shadows. We're not really sure what they're doing, but their actions cause a lot of screaming and overall confusion. Soon everybody gets split up, and each character has an individual experience with an alien. Tess, for example, is taking a bath (why she’s taking a bath when there are aliens in the house I’m not sure) when an alien darts out from the corner and does the alien equivalent of yelling "bugga bugga bugga." This may have been a mating tactic for the alien, I don't know, but whatever it was, it doesn't work, cause Tess runs out of the bathroom.

In general, the aliens act the way I’d expect drunken Wizard of Oz munchkins to act. There’s no real method to what they’re doing, outside of darting and dashing from one shadow to the next. Since they pose no danger, their presence feels a little like a traveling stage show. Jump in, do a little dance, jump back out. On to the next town! It’d be funny if it weren’t so odd.

Aliiiiiien!!!

Eventually there’s some connection between the aliens and Jaybird, and, I think, the aliens tell the humans that they’re killing themselves and that everyone on earth is really sad. After that, they leave, and Tess's family is left to wonder the same thing we are: WHAT THE HELL JUST HAPPENED??

Night Skies is plagued by that most troubling of script problems: It’s un-engaging. The people are boring. The relationships are boring. And the story’s boring. Now part of this is because of the 18 million alien films we’ve seen since the 80s. We demand more creativity from our sci-fi today than we did then. But that’s only part of it. The characters in particular don't have enough going on. They all have their own angle (angry, retarded, religious), but they're essentially townsfolk with absolutely nothing going on in their day-to-day lives. It’s as if these characters were written specifically to wait for this moment, and will cease to exist as soon as the moment is over. They don’t have any life. Even Jaybird, the most original character here, feels DOA. I was hoping to experience more of a connection with the characters. But it never happened.

But the biggest issue of all is that there are no stakes in the script. Now that’s a term we hear bandied about a lot in screenwriting . “Stakes.” But what does it really mean? I try to explain it by asking a question: What consequences does the situation driving your story have on the characters? Are the consequences big? Or are they small? In the case of Night Skies, the situation driving the story is a group of midget aliens badgering a rural family. Not trying to kill. Not trying to injure. Just badgering. What are the stakes of badgering? The worst thing that can happen is for the family to get a little spooked. Is that really so terrible? Of course not. And for that reason, we’re never truly invested in the story. Take Paranormal Activity on the other hand, where the antagonist was an invisible malevolent entity that had a connection to the devil. A horrifying death for both of our protags was a possibility at any moment. Or take Spielberg’s own “Poltergeist.” In that film, the girl is taken from the family. So the stakes are that they may never get her back, and that any one of them could be killed. In both those cases, the stakes were extremely high, and as a result, the tension was high, and the conflict between the characters was high. Now I’m not saying every movie has to have a life or death scenario, but if you’re not aware of the stakes of your story and how to increase them, you’re not going to have a lot of success in the screenwriting world.

I wouldn’t say this script was awful, but it’s pretty uninspired. And I think Spielberg and Sayles would admit as much. If this was a jumping off point, I’m sure they would’ve improved a lot of the bland choices in subsequent drafts. And there are some fun moments that give us glimpses into the origin of E.T. (an alien’s finger lighting up for example). But it’s pretty obvious why this was never made.

[ ] What the hell did I just read?
[x] wasn’t for me
[ ] worth the read
[ ] impressive
[ ] genius

What I learned: This is proof that no screenplay is a waste. Outside of every script being a learning experience, many writers mine stories, characters, or scenes out of their old failed screenplays. Part of the progression of becoming a writer is identifying what the most interesting thing about your idea is, and then mining it for everything it’s worth. Beginner writers, for whatever reason, tend to focus on the least or only the mildly interesting aspects of their story, leaving their script feeling like a bowl of untapped potential. As writers begin to intrinsically understand conflict (outside of just making two people fight) and which concepts provide the best opportunity for conflict, this problem goes away. So head back to those old ideas with your new mindset and see if you can't find that nugget of a concept you overlooked.

Friday Free-for-All: Orson Welles

I've been waiting a while for the right time to post these infamous viral clips. This is Orson Welles' classic outtakes from a Paul Masson wine commercial.

And this is the audio recording from a voiceover session for a frozen peas commercial. This is the infamous bootleg that inspired voice actor Maurice LaMarche's impression that was feature on The Critic and later became the basis for Brain on Pinky and the Brain.

Friday Free-for-All: Orson Welles

I've been waiting a while for the right time to post these infamous viral clips. This is Orson Welles' classic outtakes from a Paul Masson wine commercial.

BEST WORST MOVIE to get theatrical release!

Awesome! BEST WORST MOVIE, the documentary I raved about after I saw it at AFI Fest last fall, is getting a theatrical release. I just got this from producer-director Michael Paul Stephenson's email update. Below his email, you'll find the official press release:

"BEST WORST MOVIE" GETS THEATRICAL RELEASE
Area23a to Release Award-Winning Doc About The Worst Movie Ever Made

After four grueling years of green blood, sweat and troll tears, I can finally announce that our film BEST WORST MOVIE will be released in theaters this spring.

You'll find the official press release after the jump, but I wanted to drop you a quick note to thank you for joining our email family and for being apart of this adventure over the past few years.

I’m as tied to Best Worst Movie as any one person can be to a film. ‘Troll 2’ has been a defining factor in my life since I was 10 years old, and Best Worst Movie seems like a culmination of this era. To see it on a big screen, to watch the outpouring of love from the fans after a screening, and to see the enthusiastic and thoughtful support is at once relieving, rewarding, incredibly surreal and meaningful.

If you had the chance to see BEST WORST MOVIE on the festival circuit and liked it, or if you'd like to see BEST WORST MOVIE in your city... we need your help spreading the word about the theatrical release. SHOUT IT OUT! Request it in your city, ask your theater to book it, write about it, sing it, dance it, tweet it, eat it, just don't... piss on it!

We have plenty of cool surprises in store. And if you haven't already, please take a lightning-quick second to say hello:

1. Drop by our Facebook family,
2. TEXT "TROLL2" to 83043 (Yes, it's free).
3. Follow me on Twitter.

hospitably,

Michael Paul Stephenson
Producer & Director - BEST WORST MOVIE
Website: http://www.bestworstmovie.com
info@bestworstmovie.com

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
Press contact:

Liz Berger
(212) 277-7558
Liz.Berger@42west.net

AREA23A TO RELEASE “BEST WORST MOVIE”

New York, NY (February 24, 2010) – Area23A, the event-based film distribution company formed in January by industry veteran Richard Abramowitz and Kirt Eftekhar, founder of Ocule Films, announced today that it will theatrically release the award-winning “Best Worst Movie” which has been an official selection in over thirty film festivals. The documentary had its world premiere at South by Southwest and has received several awards including the Top Ten Audience Favorite at Hot Docs 2009. Area23a will open the film in Austin, Los Angeles, New York and other markets to follow this Spring.

In “Best Worst Movie” Michael Paul Stephenson makes his directorial debut by exploring one of the worst and most critically panned movies ever made, Troll 2, which he starred in twenty years ago as a child.

In 1989, Italian director, Claudio Fragrasso cast small-town dentist Dr. George Hardy and a group of unwitting Utah actors in the ultra-low budget horror film, Troll 2. Soon after its disastrous release, Dr. Hardy retired from his short-lived acting career and returned to dentistry in his hometown of Alabama, unaware of the legions of fans that would one day recognize him as a cult movie luminary.

“Best Worst Movie” reveals the improbable heartfelt story of an Alabama dentist-turned-cult-movie icon and an Italian filmmaker as they come to terms with their internationally revered cinematic failure.

Stephenson and his wife, Lindsay Stephenson produced "Best Worst Movie" under their production company, Magic Stone Productions. Brad Klopman also serves as a producer.

Of the acquisition, Stephenson says “Our movie – that we have devoted the last four years to – can not be in better hands than with Area23a. They have demonstrated their ability to skillfully handle specialized films in a crowded market place. The recent success of “Anvil!” is only the most recent example of Richard’s expertise in theatrical film distribution.”

Abramowitz adds “We are very excited to bring ‘Best Worst Movie’ to theaters across the country. The movie has been generating both incredible word-of-mouth and critical acclaim through the festival circuit. Audiences are appreciating the film’s humor and are also moved by its homage to bad movies and, at least in this case, the good people who make them.” Said Eftekhar, "Keep your eyes open: we're bringing a "Best Worst Movie/Troll 2" party to your town soon..."

Area23a is currently distributing the acclaimed “Soundtrack for a Revolution,” “The Mighty Uke,” “American Harmony,” and “They Came to Play.” Later this year it will release Sandy Cioffi's “Sweet Crude."

BEST WORST MOVIE to get theatrical release!

The Bitter Script Reader Fan page on Facebook

Well, I finally gave in to the last social network (that I know of) and joined Facebook. It took way more time than should have been necessary, but I finally figured out how to sync Tweet-Deck with the page. (I guess the problem had something to do with creating a fan page before I'd created an actual profile?)

Anyway, as arrogant as it is to be counting "Fans" it's even more pathetic to look at that counter and see ZERO fans, so please feel free to join the page, start discussions and whatnot. Otherwise I'll be forced to create a bunch of fake IDs to boost my fan count and I can't see that ending well.

The Bitter Script Reader Fan Page or just search Facebook for "Bitter Script Reader."

The Bitter Script Reader Fan page on Facebook

Titan Week - "Fahrenheit 451"

TITAN WEEK 4 OF 5 OF 1

We're 4 days into the Titan Theme Week. We started with Shane Black. Moved on to Amanda Peet's husband, David Benioff. Then we tackled the dynamo writing duo of Roberto Orci and Alex Kurtzman. And today, we're reading ourselves some Darabont.

Genre: Sci-fi
Premise: In a dystopian future, Firefighters start fires instead of put them out.
About: I don’t think there’s any question that Darabont is a true titan in this business. The Shawshank Redemption is one of those examples of screenwriting perfection. It does a lot of things most writers would tell you not to do. Its tone is depressing, it’s long and drawn out, probably has too many characters, depends too much on voice over, and doesn’t have a female lead. Yet it’s pure unadulterated awesomeness, and while credit obviously goes to Steven King, what Darabont did by taking one of King’s most unmarketable ideas and turning into an Oscar-nominated screenplay was pretty amazing. Darabont is easily one of the most respected writers in town. If a script needs fixing – not pampering or gloss, but actual fixing – this is the man that will come in and do it. – This particular script, Farenheit 451, has been in development for something like 25 years. Darabont’s adaptation of the material is believed to be one of the best unmade screenplays in Hollywood.
Writer: Frank Darabont (based on the novel by Ray Bradbury)
Details: 121 pages (September 2005 draft)

I have a secret.

I’ve tried to read Farenheit 451 on three separate occasions and couldn’t get past the first 10 pages. I’m sure you want to know why, so I’ll just come out and say it.

Robot dogs.

I’m sorry but I just can’t wrap my head around robot dogs. And I’m a sci-fi geek! Why would robot dogs ever need to exist?? If you need something that only dogs can do, why not get a real dog? But if something is so complicated as to require a robotic equivalent and you have the technology to create that robot equivalent, why not just create a robotic human instead? Doesn’t it make more sense in the context of what the human robot would be able to do? I understand this was part of the original novel, but in a post-Transformers world, robot dogs sound kinda lame.

The truth is, I chose this theme week specifically for this script, as I've wanted to read it for a long time, despite the robot dog issue. Lots of people who I’ve talked to love it, and I really wanted to at least say that I’d read the thing. So here goes.

Guy Montag is a fireman. But not the kind of fireman you and I know. Montag likes to start fires, not end them. In fact, all the fire departments we depend on when we accidentally throw a Wendy’s Chicken Club with the tin foil wrapper still attached into the microwave, have no interest in putting out fires anymore. Their purpose is to find people who still like to read a good John Grisham novel, and BURN THEIR HOUSE DOWN.

Cause in this future, the government hates books. Thinks they corrupt us. Brings out impulses we wouldn’t otherwise have. Man, if only these guys would’ve come around before Peter Jackson read The Lovely Bones.

Firefighters in this far off future, which by now is probably the far off past, since Bradbury wrote the novel back in the 1600s, are basically militarized. Their operation is honed and disciplined to take down offenders quickly, and to evoke a sense of fear in the community. We watch as they storm into houses, tear down walls and burst through ceilings to find these compilations of devil paper. And then burn them! If you don’t like it, you’ve got an angry robot dog to deal with.

Eventually Montag gets curious what all the fuss is about and sneaks home a copy of Lord Of The Flies. Even though he watches Lost every Tuesday at 9, the book is a revelation to him, and it feeds his curiosity for more. So now when Montag goes in with the crew to burn a house down, he stashes more books down his pants than The Situation stashes phone numbers. And the more he reads, the more enlightened he becomes.

Unfortunately, the Firefighter Chief starts getting suspicious of Montag, whose book reading has brought about a moodiness that didn’t before exist. People Montag has conspired with start getting caught, their houses burned and their families taken away. Montag’s wife pleads with him to get rid of the books, but he refuses. Eventually, Montag can't run anymore, and must face the consequences for his actions.

The problem with Fahrenheit is that the world has changed so much since 1953. As I listen to these characters confide in each other about how important or how scary books are, their plight doesn’t resonate on any level. I suppose there are some places in the world where Fahrenheit’s themes are actually still relevant, but America isn’t into burning books anymore and hasn’t been for a long time.

I’m not saying this couldn’t have been fascinating 50 years ago when people rode around on chariots. But today? The internet is essentially one giant book that we have access to 24/7. If Iran can’t keep its citizens from using Twitter, we ain’t going to be able to stop people from ordering the latest Dan Brown novel on Amazon. Not to mention Facebook! Can you imagine the outrage from the community if we destroyed Facebook?? The implications of a world without Farmville are too much to bear. The day I don’t know when my friend Alandra just planted a patch of strawberries is the day that civilization is dead my friend. The day it is dead.

But seriously, it’s an issue. Darabont doesn’t even mention the internet here, which implies we’re observing this through some sort of alternate future. And from what I understand, this is why lead actors like Mel Gibson and Tom Hanks keep dropping out. Trying to imagine a future without internet is like trying to imagine a future without cars and airplanes. How do you make that leap? This is not to mention music, TV and movies, which essentially pose the same problem as books, and yet for whatever reason aren’t held to the same standards.

Despite that, there’s still a lot of care that went into this script, a lot of love. And you can feel it on the page. The prose and the attention to detail are all top notch, and as a result, you’re able to ignore some of the problems. But in the end, the logistical issues run too deep, and I can’t see this being made without a major rewrite.

How would you rewrite it? I think you’d have to embrace technology instead of ignore it, and probably focus the script on the government wanting to destroy our access to all information, from the internet all the way on down to the written word, a true modern-day telling of the story. That could be interesting. Just please, for my sake, don’t include any robot dogs. :)

[ ] What the hell did I just read?
[x] wasn’t for me
[ ] worth the read
[ ] impressive
[ ] genius

What I learned: What I like about Darabont is he doesn’t write to impress you. He writes to tell the story, yet ends up impressing you in the process. So whereas a lesser writer might over-write their descriptions to try and impress the reader, Darabont makes sure that everything he describes is motivated. For example, here, he describes the fire truck starting: “The ENGINES START, a turbine WHINE exploding to a DEEP BASSO ROAR. Like a dragon waking up. Ready to breathe flame.” So descriptive. But not gratuitous. Remember, descriptions don’t sell screenplays. Concept, story, characters, and plot do. So resist that 8 line poetic description of how your character walks from his house to his car, and just tell the story instead.

Tuesday Talkback (on Wednesday): Screenwriter scams

We had a good Talkback post last week as you guys weighed in on the merits of InkTip, so I figured that it might be good to put that knowledge to use again this week.

I hope I'm not opening up a huge can of worms here, but I'm putting out an open call for anyone to post on any screenwriting-related scams they've come across. I'm thinking of something along the lines of submitting your script to an agency only to have them tell you that you must pay $50 for another (secretly affiliated) company to do coverage on the script.

Awareness is the enemy of these scams so let's educate each other.

However, it's not a scam if you paid for coverage and got back notes that you didn't like or agree with. That's something between you and the coverage service. But feel free to post any contests or services that are clearly illegitimate.

Tuesday Talkback (on Wednesday): Screenwriter scams

Titan Week - "Tell No One"

TITAN WEEK 3 OF 5

Day 1 we brought you Shane Black. Day 2 we tackled questionable titan David Benioff. And now on our third day of Titan Week, we bring in the two highest paid writers in the business, Roberto Orci and Alex Kurtzman! This oughta be fun. :)

Genre: Thriller
Premise: A widowed social worker receives a strange message that forces him to reevaluate what happened the day his wife was murdered.
About: How can you have a Titan Week without Kurtzman and Orci!! The two most beloved and respected writers in Hollywood!? Heh heh. You knew I had to pull these guys out. They’re the highest paid and most sought-after writers in town. And absolutely nobody thinks they should be but the people who hire them. Kurtzman and Orci first came on the scene in 2005, when they wrote Michael Bay’s “The Island.” They followed that with the second Zorro film, Mission Impossible 3, Transformers, Star Trek, and of course, the single greatest movie to ever be made, Transformers: Revenge Of The Fallen. But “Tell No One” is the script they wrote before all that success, all the way back in 2002. Now some of you may already be familiar with “Tell No One” as a French film that made some waves on the independent circuit in 2008 (it was released in France in 2006). I didn’t see it because I’d been burned too many times by supposedly groundbreaking French Films which turned out to be mind-numbingly horrible. I don’t think there’s anything worse than sitting through a bad French film. I’m glad I ignored it, because it allowed me to have this amazing reading experience. Now a few of you have probably noticed that the dates don’t quite match up. How can Orci and Kurtzman have adapted a 2006 film in 2002? Simple. Orci and Kurtzman have a time machine. It’s what allows them to know what we’re going to like before we like it. I’m just kidding. Or am I??? Actually, the French film was an adaptation of a novel written by American writer, Harlan Coben. I’ve never read a Harlan Coben book before, but people tell me “Tell No One” was one of his lesser efforts. Anyway, Kurtzman and Orci adapted the book before the French did. The French just beat them to the theaters. I still think this deserves the Hollywood treatment though. It’s a can’t miss baby.
Writers: Roberto Orci and Alex Kurtzman (based off the novel by Harlan Coben)
Details: 122 pages (5th Draft, 2002)

Warning: If you know nothing about this script or this movie and you like thrillers, stop now, download the script, and read it. You’ll thank me.

At Transformers premiere. "Proud" is not the adjective I'd use to describe these expressions.

Uhhhhh, can someone tell me WHERE THE HELL THIS SCRIPT WAS HIDING??? What a freaking gangbusters screenplay. I haven’t flown through a story that fast since The Cat In The Hat. And I thought The Grey was a good thriller. This is the executive suite of thrillers. 3000 square feet. Sweeping views of Vegas. TVs that pop out of the floor. Tell No One? Tell everyone!

But I’ll get to that in a second. First, we gotta deal with Orci and Kurtzman.

Every burgeoning writer in town cites these two as the oozing puss-filled sores of the screenwriting world. They point to the Transformers movies as their main argument. Anybody, they say, responsible for writing those movies, cannot be a good writer. And I will say this. The Transformers movies are two of the most incomprehensible mainstream movies I’ve ever seen, especially the second one. The thing is, the fault doesn’t lie squarely with them. These guys were brought in to realize a vision from a director who has no interest or understanding of story, to plug in characters that the toy company forced them to, to come up with a believable scenario by which aliens came to earth taking the form of transforming motor vehicles, to integrate pre-existing action sequences into a story that hadn’t been written yet, and to push all of this together in a few weeks, due to the writer’s strike (on the second one). In short, they were set up to fail. Any single one of us would’ve failed as well. It’s hard enough coming up with a good script when NO ONE is telling you how to write it. But when everyone is? And in a few weeks? There's no way.

However, I’m not here to try and convince you to like Orci and Kurtzman. I was simply curious about reading a screenplay of theirs before they hit the bigtime. These are the scripts that usually GIVE these writers a shot at the big time, so it's interesting to see what warranted that shot. And holy shit, this shot hit the bullseye.

David Beck and Elizabeth Parker are in love. They have been ever since they were 12 years old, doing the whole “carve the initials in the tree” thing. There’s only one issue affecting their otherwise bliss-filled relationship. David has seizures. Intense full-on blackouts where he doesn’t remember a thing. And one day, not long after the two are married, David is hit by something, triggering a seizure, and he blacks out. When he wakes up, he learns that his wife has been brutally murdered - the only thing he’s ever loved, stolen from him forever.

Four years later, David, now a social worker for abused children in Philadelphia, is trying to put the pieces of his life back together. He’s even dating a doctor, Anna, who helps some of the kids he brings in. Even though it’s not what he envisioned for himself, it’s a job Elizabeth was passionate about, and he feels a duty to carry it on. But the job is taxing, difficult, and he’s thinking about moving on to something more lucrative, something that’ll give him a cozy life, something that will help him finally move on from Elizabeth.

HUGE SPOILERS – PLEASE STOP READING NOW IF YOU HAVE ANY INTEREST IN THIS SCRIPT

And then David gets a message on his computer. He clicks a link. A live video feed. Of Elizabeth. At a park. Older. Today. Right now! Looking up into the camera!

It can’t be. There’s no way. His wife is dead. Isn’t she?

As David tries to make sense of the nonsensical, a car containing two murdered men is found in the lake next to where Elizabeth was murdered. These men were killed at the same time and with the same weapon that Elizabeth was. There are grave implications to this news. The serial killer who killed Elizabeth was thought to have only killed women. That’s why he supposedly left David alive. But if two men were also killed, why was David’s life spared? David has gone from mourning widow to number one suspect.

The worst thing about that? David’s not sure he *isn’t* a suspect. And actually, he’s not sure of anything anymore. Was the video feed of Elizabeth real? A fantasy? Could his fractured seizure-ridden mind be creating this vision to cope with the fact that he killed his wife?

Forced to go on the run or end up on the wrong side of the death penalty, David must scrape together the pieces of his wife’s secretive life, and find out what really happened to her that fateful day. Old friends, old family members, co-workers – no one can be trusted, and yet he needs all of their help to survive.

Tell No One takes its cues from the best, namely The Fugitive, and actually improves on the formula. Whereas The Fugitive has two gargantuan driving forces – the chase and Ford having to find out who killed his wife, Tell No One adds two additional mysteries: Is David the killer and is his wife still alive? With all these amazing threads going on at once, there isn’t a single sub-standard moment in the script. My admiration for this screaming fast story grew by the page because I’m so used to these things falling apart under their own weight. The twists stop making sense. The character motivations become ludicrous. The finale turns out to be a letdown. But Tell No One is the opposite. Every single story decision here is perfect. In fact, if I were teaching a class on how to write a mystery thriller, this is the script I would use to teach it. It’s that good.

And why is it that good? It’s no different than what we were talking about the other day with Taken. Tell No One gets the emotional component right. In the beginning, we see David and Elizabeth grow up together, fall in love together, get married, and start their life. So when Elizabeth is killed, it’s not just David who’s lost someone. It’s us. We watched this girl grow up. We watched her love. We watched her dream. We loved Elizabeth just as much as he did, and as a result, when she returns, we’re just as desperate for David to find her as he is. But the point is, if you stripped this thing of all its twist and turns, we’d still be pulling for these characters, because we like them that much.

As for the writing itself, it’s pretty solid. Kurtzman and Orci created a nice device that I really enjoyed. In general, I dislike unmotivated flashbacks because of their tendency to feel unnatural. Throughout the script, K and O use David's seizures as a way to flash back to the day of the murder. It’s a little thing, but it plays nicely because it’s motivated by character (specifically – this character’s seizures). Always look for natural ways to move into your flashbacks, as opposed to just hitting us with them out of nowhere. It makes a difference.

The one thing that drove me crazy were Kurtzman and Orci’s use of underlined dialogue. Normally, this kind of stuff doesn’t bother me. But these two, for whatever reason, underline nearly every word of their characters' dialogue (I guess to give it emphasis?). But instead of giving it emphasis, it gives us headaches, as we’re forced to change the way we read, starting and stopping so we can mentally annunciate the underlined words. It took me half the script to force myself to ignore it, and man was it annoying.

I’m sure some of you will be comparing this to the French film, and with that film nabbing a 93% approval on Rotten Tomatoes, I’m preparing for the barrage of reasons why this doesn’t match up to it. But I’ve never seen the film, so this was a totally new experience for me, and I think they hit it out of the park. Really great script.

[ ] What the hell did I just read?
[ ] wasn’t for me
[ ] worth the read
[x] impressive (Top 10)
[ ] genius

What I learned: The "found key that leads to the mysterious lockbox" device is one of the few things you can count on to ALWAYS WORK in a screenplay. Every. Freaking. Time! Cause we’re inherently curious about what the hell could be in that box. You can never go wrong with this device. (Just try and make sure what’s inside is something unique!).

Interview with Joe Ollinger - winner of the "I WILL Read Your F***ing Screenplay" Contest

It's a blog crossover today! A few weeks back I invited everyone to submit their worst screenplay for a contest that involved me critiquing their script as part of an upcoming column. After several great pitches, I picked Joe Ollinger as the winner. Today you can find the resulting article, 140, as a guest-blogger post on The Story Spot. Go check out my live-Tweet review of Joe's script "Blooming Season" there today, but first, read this interview with Joe.

Tell me a little bit about yourself.

I grew up in a small swamp town in Florida and moved to Los Angeles to go to USC in 2002. I graduated in 2006 with a B.F.A. in Writing for Screen and Television and a B.A. in Psychology. After that I worked for the University and also worked from home as a reader for a production company. I'm still working as a reader, but I quit my other job and I'm now attending Southwestern Law School. I hope to one day either coach the Miami Dolphins or eat a 100-ounce steak.

What led you to write BLOOMING SEASON? Any inspirations in particular?

At the time I was really into those 1970's sci-fi movies like Soylent Green and Planet of the Apes. I've been an avid sci-fi fan my whole life, and it was the genre I felt the most comfortable with at the time.

You called BLOOMING SEASON the second-worst thing you've written. There's no delicate way to ask this... How much worse was #1?

I wrote an untitled schlocky action script about involving a bounty hunter and a snuff porn cult. It was fun and quick to write, but after I finished the first draft I looked at it and basically said, "Yep, that's not worth rewriting." Actually, in truth, that screenplay is executed significantly better than Blooming Season, but the premise isn't really specific enough or interesting enough to spend time making it better. It was good practice, though, and every page of bad or mediocre writing gets you closer to being a good writer.

At the time you wrote BLOOMING SEASON, were you convinced all you needed to do was get it to an agent and you'd be the next hot thing? How long was it before you looked at objectively?

I was convinced I had written a good screenplay, I'll say that. I had no idea how the business worked at the time. I was a freshman in college, so I basically put the thing aside to focus on writing new material for a while. I never did a big rewrite on it for a couple of reasons: (1) when 28 Days Later Came Out, I thought there was too much similarity between the "rage" virus in that movie and the insanity plague in mine; and (2) after learning more about the industry and doing some research on script sale statistics, I realized that it's basically impossible to break in as a screenwriter with sci-fi material. Sci-fi movies aren't that common, and sci-fi specs don't sell very often. So I basically let the script die and chalked it up as a loss. Fortunately I also love writing comedy, so I started doing more of that, and less sci-fi.

Did you, like me with my first spec, waste some potentially good contacts by giving them BLOOMING SEASON when you might have been better served by waiting until you had a really strong spec?

I did waste at least one potential contact, but in retrospect I didn't make the mistake a lot of writers make by alienating a bunch of people they don't even really know yet, harassing them to read a passion project. I was probably fortunate that, for whatever reason, I didn't feel the urgency a lot of people feel to get material "out there."

You're making a really good point, though -- I would recommend that writers finish at least three feature scripts and go through at least a couple of rewrites on each, before they show anything to anyone. Unless it's just for notes or something, obviously.

What did you learn from the experience of writing BLOOMING SEASON?

I would say the chief thing I took away from it was a lesson in confidence. I learned that I could write a screenplay in a couple of months. I hear too many writers say they've "been working on a screenplay for the last couple years," and that type of thing. I think that's ridiculous. If you want to be an actual writer, and not just another guy with "a" screenplay, you need to complete projects. Massaging your passion project for two years isn't going to help you. If you get too close to a story, it's almost definitely not as great as you think it is, and odds are it never will be.

Other than that, I would again say that every page you write gets you closer to where you want to be. So by that math, Blooming Season got me about a hundred pages closer.

What do you credit for your growth as a writer over all?

That's a tough question. I can't give a complete answer, but the obvious factors are (1) the great education in storytelling I got at USC Film and (2) reading lots and lots of material.

I think a lot of aspiring writers overlook the necessity of studying storytelling analytically. If you don't put a lot of thought and examination into what works and what doesn't, you're writing blindly. If I had just gone ahead and written another script after Blooming Season, without putting some study into structure and dialogue and character development and premise, I doubt I would have shown any improvement.

You say you're a script reader. Would you mind telling me for whom? (If not, that's cool.) How does reading a lot of scripts translate to being better at writing scripts?

I won't say for whom, but I'll say that I work for a director/writer/producer with more than one Oscar. The company is relatively small, but it's had a pretty busy, relatively high-profile slate since I started working for it in 2006.

Reading scripts might be the best way of improving one's writing. Actually, let me qualify that: reading scripts and analyzing them might be the best way. If you just read screenplays and don't put thought into what works and what doesn't, it's probably not going to do much for you.

At this point I've probably written around 2,000 pages of coverage in my life. I've seen terrible screenplays, bad screenplays, good screenplays, and even great screenplays (though thankfully I've never had a job where I had to read a lot of un-repped amateur stuff, so I can't claim to have really seen the worst of the worst).

You don't need to read nearly that much to reap the benefits. It doesn't take long before you start thinking of your own material in the same way you evaluate the material of others. If you know your stuff, you can spot mistakes quickly and easily.

And finally, plug away. Tell me all about the specs you're trying to get people to look at now. List as many as you like.

I don't know if I've been "trying to get people to look at" stuff. As you know, the spec market isn't a friendly place right now; statistically, fewer screenplays are selling than ever before. So I've been working in other genres for the past couple years. But here are some loglines of projects I'd still like to get out there, in the odd event that anyone would ever care to read stuff by the winner of a "Worst Script" contest...

Moose Chunks and Me -- a teen/sports/romantic comedy
In order to impress the girl of his dreams, a high school nerd must befriend his chief competition: a popular though moronic meathead named Moose Chunks.
I co-wrote this one with a guy named Frank Howell. It finished in the semi-finals of the Bluecat Competition, for whatever that's worth.

Wanderlost -- an adventure/comedy
An aimless young man from a family of great explorers finally gets his chance at greatness when he inherits his grandfather's memoirs. With the help of his quirky family and his foreign sidekick, he embarks on a bizarre journey across the world in a race against a jetsetting playboy for the last undiscovered treasure.

Tool: The Movie -- a college/"bro-mance" comedy
Two frat boys, a nerd and a player, join the staff of a feminist retreat in order to pursue their dream girls. To succeed, the nerd will have to learn how to be a tool, and the player will have to learn how not to.

The Crush -- a comedic superhero series
The adventures of The Crush, a young superhero with the ability to smash things with his mind, and a frustrating inability to use this power around women he feels attracted to. Faced with the every day struggles of a college freshman, The Crush must also deal with various strange and powerful villains, including his arch-nemesis, an alluring former-stripper-turned-billionairess.
I've been working with an awesome animator named Arvin Bautista (www.greasypigstudios.com) on this project, developing it both as a comic book and an animated TV series.

... and a couple of novels...

The Apex Predator -- a thriller with some sci-fi elements
A detective must kill alternate versions of himself in several parallel realities, in order to return to his own universe and save the woman he loves from being murdered by her fiance.

Loopback -- don't know what genre I'd stick this under
A former NASA engineer teams up with a clairvoyant twelve year-old kid to exploit the Las Vegas casinos. Set against the backdrop of the late 1960's, the story deals with the possibility that the Apollo 11 moon landing may have been faked.
I also have a screenplay of this story, but I think the book is better.

I lied. One more thing - if people want to read BLOOMING SEASON (or contact you about any of your other specs), may they reach you at your e-mail address?

They can contact me at jojofromsoflo@yahoo.com.

Interview with Joe Ollinger - winner of the "I WILL Read Your F***ing Screenplay" Contest

Titan Week - "Shadow Company"

TITAN WEEK - REVIEW 1 OF 5

Welcome to Titan Week, where we feature five scripts by writers who currently are or at one time were titans in the industry. What constitutes a titan? Maybe they're that writer every producer in town calls when they need a rewrite on their 200 million dollar film. Maybe they've sold multiple million dollar spec scripts. Maybe they're universally praised and respected. Maybe their style was so impressive they influenced an entire generation of writers. In order to keep things fresh, I'm going to let you suggest the last review of the week, as I haven't chosen a script for Friday yet. So if there's a particular script by a huge writer you think I should review, go ahead and suggest it in the comments section. In the meantime, let's start off with one of the biggest names in screenwriting history - Shane Black. I'll hand it over to Roger as he takes us back to a simpler time. A time where Pac-Man ruled and when Michael Jackson was cool...the first time. Here he is reviewing "Shadow Company."

Genre: Horror, Action, Science Fiction
Premise: Jake Pollard is a forever-changed Vietnam vet, a pariah just scraping by in American society. When he learns that the bodies of six MIAs, found sealed in a Cambodian temple, are being shipped back home for a military funeral at the National Veterans Cemetery, he transforms from drifter to man on a mission. When the six MIAs resurrect and start killing everyone in the town of Merit, California, Pollard makes a last stand, revealing both his ties to the townspeople and his shadowy past with the MIAs.
About: Shane Black's first script. Written in 1984. Got him his first agent. Optioned by Universal. After the success of Lethal Weapon, John Carpenter came on as director (this would have been his follow-up to They Live) and Walter Hill attached himself as executive producer. This draft is dated October 20, 1988 and is co-written by Black's pal, Fred Dekker (Night of the Creeps, The Monster Squad). I'm not sure if Dekker was always a co-writer or if he came onboard to help Black write this particular draft. Do any of you dear readers out there know?
Writers: Shane Black & Fred Dekker

Shane Black

Not that it matters, but the first character we meet in Shane Black and Fred Dekker's "Shadow Company" is Lt. Col. Frank Nikko. Nikko dies a peculiar and interesting death, and his presence in the story exists only to give our monsters the appropriate shock and awe that is required for such horror movie introductions.

It's February, 1973 in Saigon and Nikko is looking for some action. Curiouser and curiouser, Nikko finds a backroom poker game inside of Torchy's, that ubiquitous den of vice found in many Walter Hill scripts.

A quick aside: In both format and language, Black and Dekker adopt the samurai-spare haiku style that Walter Hill acquired from screenwriter Alex Jacobs (Point Blank), and they use it with aplomb. The result is a hardboiled whiskey prose that fits the violent subject matter appropriately. It's no wonder that Mr. Hill was attached as executive producer to the project.

Six American commandos play a silent game of poker. Their matching black berets and tattoos (note: black snakes coiled around a machine-gun) denote Special Forces, and their silent and robotic demeanor in the face of Nikko's wisecracking makes them plain creepy.

Things get creepier when the stakes are raised and one soldier cuts off his pinkie finger and throws it into the pot. While most normal men would probably exit the room at this point, Nikko sticks around and is killed because he's a.) annoying and b.) a red shirt.

Our prologue ends when Major Garrett Stark (paging Professor Stark?) and Col. Woodhurst tell these same six men, "The mission you men are about to undertake does not exist...nor do you exist...You are not ordinary soldiers. Your training has purged you of the true enemies...Fear...Pity...Conscience..."

The men have names, but they are unimportant. What is important is these men are flying into the jungle to die, and that apparently, there used to be a seventh man.

Cool prologue. Who's our main guy?

Jake Pollard is a Vietnam vet who can't even afford a grilled-cheese sandwich at a greasy spoon. But like most badass Western heroes, he settles for a cup of coffee.

Black.

It's sixteen years later and people still harbor harsh feelings towards Vietnam. Case in point, the guy in the diner who calls Pollard a baby killer (which contrasts sharply with the moment beforehand when Pollard gets friendly with the shy kid playing with a toy gun behind the counter).

If we don't know it's a Shane Black script yet, then we should note that the story is set in the month of December. A Christmas setting is a Shane Black staple.

Perhaps it's the immediate nostalgia that accompanies the Santa Claus & Reindeer imagery, or perhaps it's the way this nostalgia mixes with our conflicted feelings that Christmas culls forth. Either way, if we have learned anything from Lethal Weapon, The Long Kiss Goodnight, and Kiss Kiss Bang Bang, as setting, the month of December creates a helluva backdrop for mayhem and action.

Shane Black playing Hawkins in "Predator"

As Pollard is about to give Insulting Diner Patron a piece of his mind, a television newscast catches his attention (a heraldic device also used in The Long Kiss Goodnight). Some self-styled mercenaries have retrieved the bodies of six American MIAs.

The interesting thing about these bodies?

The Vietnamese sealed them in a Cambodian temple. Why? They were afraid of men they had already killed. They believed the men were more than just men.

The MIAs are gonna be buried at the National Veterans Cemetery in Merit, California, and soon enough (with reasons we can only guess at), Pollard is off to Merit.

Once there, he gathers so much firepower it's like he's preparing for Vietnam: Part 2.

Who are the rest of our players?

There's Kyle Traeger, an eighteen-year old kid who is so brooding it's like he field-stripped Heathcliff from Wuthering Heights and wears his skin as a cape. He lost his father to the horrors of Vietnam.

Kyle is in love with Heather Stockton, daughter of one of the dead MIAs.

Heather's stepdad is Sheriff Buchalter, who has married the widow, Doris Stockton.

Honestly, the characters peppered throughout the script are just cannon fodder and headshots.

The troubled romantic relationship of Kyle and Heather and their relationship to the MIAs and Jake Pollard is the emotional core of the story.

So these MIAs, they're zombies, right?

The town of Merit is in for a long and gory night (Black and Dekker-style) when the MIAs crawl out of their grave, bayonet and shoot the MPs in their way, and raid the armory.

There they acquire grenades, bouncing betties, c4, detonators, tripwire, and lots and lots of guns.

They don't eat flesh, they don't eat brains.

But what they do is kill.

A lot.

And they themselves are very hard to kill. At a point of crazed desperation, Heather asks, "Why...why can't they die?"

To which Pollard replies, "Because the Government won't let them."

So...what are they?

In 1965 Col. Woodhurst commissioned a team of scientists to experiment on twenty men assembled from seventeen Special Forces units. A two year program involving drugs, hypnosis and brainwashing to eliminate weakness and conscience.

To strip away a soldier's humanity and leave nothing but fight.

America, like the Nazi's, tried to create a Superman.

The only catch is, these men would have to die and be resurrected to complete the process.

And the resurrecting mechanism?

Agent Orange.

Only seven men survived the program.

They are Shadow Company. And they're credo is: My will is strong / My name is dread / I fear no death / 'Cause I'm already dead...

So lemme guess. Pollard is the seventh member of Shadow Company?

Yep. And not only that, but Kyle Traeger is his son.

Interesting. So how does it all play out?

How you would expect. Remember, Fred Dekker helped write this thing, so there's lots of bodily mayhem and gory explosions. If you've seen The Monster Squad, then you know there's going to be scenes with disembodied limbs and severed torsos trying to kill our heroes.

There are some nice classic creature feature moments as well. That couple making out in the car? Dude, of course it's going to end gruesomely. And as it should, amirite?

Some macho buddy-action moments between Pollard and Kyle. Sure, it's damn cheesy, but it's also damn entertaining. If you like Shane Black, and if you like Fred Dekker, it's all stuff that works on a visceral level. It's all stuff that would work in an action-horror movie.

Sure, as a guy that reads a lot of screenplays and forms opinions on how they could be possibly improved, I have my scruples. There's the usual suspect: Showing Versus Telling. I think the story could benefit by restructuring and rethinking some of the choices made in regards to the Pollard and Kyle relationship.

It's no surprise that Pollard has some type of emotional connection and backstory to Merit and the MIAs, so why not be up front with all this stuff? We know something is motivating the guy, so why try to present it as a mystery?

Again, so much is said through dialogue giving us all the information about Kyle and Heather's relationship...I would have preferred to just see it. Or would have preferred more subtlety.

An entertaining action-horror (cautionary) tale that pays homage to war movies, Westerns and low-budget zombie flicks, as distilled through the unique minds of a young Shane Black and Fred Dekker.

Definitely...

[ ] What the hell did I just read?
[ ] wasn’t for me
[x] worth the read
[ ] impressive
[ ] genius

What I learned: If you're going to have a relationship reveal late in your script, it should really be something that actually surprises the reader. In "Shadow Company", I think the writers telegraphed Pollard and Kyle's father-son relationship. Why? As a reader, I was never presented with Pollard's motivation concerning his goal, which was to stop Shadow Company. Sure, there were hints that he was the missing 7^th man of Shadow Company, but it was obvious there was more to his story. As soon as Kyle was introduced, I knew he was probably going to be Pollard's son. I think the story could have benefitted by serving us this information straight up. Think of the great relationship reveals in stories: Luke and Darth Vader, Luke and Leia, Jack and Claire in Lost...it's all stuff that comes as a surprise and fleshes out a story. It makes us think of the events that came before in a different way. We rewatch, look for clues, find different meanings, recognize the subtleties as something more. And you know, these relationships aren't really the motivating factors for the goals of the characters. Or if they are...in Darth Vader's case, it's presented in such a way that adds value to the story. In "Shadow Company", the relationship reveal feels unnecessary.